Monday, 3 December 2007

Sorting, the unromantic version of love

What have I learned about love and the selection of a partner now that I'm in my 40s, I know you're dying to hear :)
I've learned that I need to be alot more business-like and really test drive the model before I buy. Find out all the really important stuff before I start lusting after Mr Wrong. what is the important stuff u ask? Well, all the sort of things I never asked in the past. Deal-breaker stuff like:
  • Do they want kids?
  • Are they religous? Will they want me to attend services too?
  • Sex - how often, what kind and when (don't talk to me about cuddles, I've read a few online profiles of men that love cuddles....thats not me. I like to shag thanks)
  • are they homebodies or do they like travel
  • introvert or extrovert
  • what are their political views (I'm liberal, so its not likely that Mr Conservative and I will want to hang with the same people)
  • what kind of lifestyle do they lead? (drugs, exercise, eating patterns, smoker/nonsmoker, health, alcohol, gambling, sports, compulsive cleaner etc, you get the drift)

Basically anything that can't be changed because thats essentially who we are. I truly believe its best to ask these questions straight off the bat so I know where he stands and I dont waste my time trying to convince him to be someone he's not. I'll respect him just the way he is, I may not want to date him, but I think in the long run, he wouldnt want to date me either :)

Yes, I could compromise, but why? I really think I can be with someone that loves alot of the same stuff I do. I will compromise on housework, cooking, driving, painting, luggage, hotels - a whole raft of things that mean nothing to me. But the fundamentals, nope, we have to agree.

Some people might think bollocks, some will wonder what the hell I have been basing my choices on if this is new to me.....ummmmmmmmmmm well, it was basically if you like me, then I might be able to like you. And actually, those men were perfect for that time and that moment.

Yeah, I age and I learn, daily :)

h2

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