I've read through my last few posts, not exactly "I-feel-great" City.....alot of angst. My life is not bad, I just tend to hit the blog button when I'm feeling less than great. Which seems often lately........
Anyway, my part-time job demonstrates to me on a daily basis why I need to be grateful and what my life could be like if I was on another path.
Yesterday I spend the day with P a 38 year old woman, that looks around 45. P has had a life of physical and emotional abuse. She has 5 children, 3 of whom live away from home (2 with their father, one in welfare care). The courts have ruled that she may have limited access to the child in care, but will never gain custody of her again. P is under the 'high risk' section of the welfare system and has a special case worker. She is trying to make changes to her life. She has no idea what a kind and loving mother is, simply because she has never experienced one. She moved into her housing corp home yesterday, it really is lovely. They have blankets over the windows to provide some privacy, because even $10 curtains at the op-shop are out of reach to her budget. Matresses on the floor and a few pieces of furniture, it doesn't take much to create tension in this type of environment. Because there isn't enough of anything. Love, food or things that create a home (no broom even) . By the time she has bought food, $4 for a second hand broom seems too frivilous. She is given $190 per week to provide food and power to herself and her two remaining children. She has an automatic payment of $15 for a bill and rent of $84 dollars. That leaves a total of $91 to feed and provide for one 14 y old and one 2 y old. Forget clothes and doctors bills.
The 14 y old is at his most vulnerable - out of school, in the throes of puberty, being watched by CYF with a court appearance in Nov, the chances of him remaining with his mother are very low. Another statistic waiting to happen. Because the alternative life in care for the next few years will do nothing to address his problems. From the welfare care he'll be back on the streets, socially immature, with a major attitude about authority and welfare systems, alot of aggression and plenty of places to share it.
Yes, i hear people harping on about dole bludgers, beneficiaries, single mothers. Harping doesn't create self-esteem, harping ostricises and alienates sections of our society. Self esteem is the key to empowerment. The ability to lift your head up and ask for assistance, treat and be treated with respect creates a different community. Knowing that you are worth more than a lotto ticket opens doors to many possibilities.
I say, spend money on these people, do whatever it takes to show them a life worth aspiring to, expose them to experiences that have never been a part of their life. Open doors so that they can step through, assist in their introduction to a new way of being.
ENABLE and dont give up. Too many people have already given up on them, they expect you and I to give up:) Kill that expectation and create a new mantra, I believe in YOU.
Treat every aspect of their lives as interconnected and as vital to each link in their DNA chain. From our ability to get up and get dressed, to the food that is put on the table, right down to being able to look in the mirror in the morning, give blessings for another day and knowing that we have somewhere to go or something to do that sets up acheivable goals. So that at the end of the day, when we return home, tired, with food on the table that nourishes our body and hearts, we can go to sleep and think life is not so bad.
So many of our systems explore one aspect of our lives, usually money and leave all of our human needs at the door. There is no assistance for stress, poverty of the mind, sadness or feeling u are worthless. Thinking that beneficiaries are all bludgers is poverty of the mind as well, an inability to relate and feel compassion for someone elses experience.
carpe diem people.
H2
