Feeling a little tired tonight. Too many things to do, not enough energy or time :) I feel like I've woken up after a 5 year comma, with opportunities rising up before me each day as if they're on a high speed conveyor belt, if I miss it, the chance is gone forever or until that conveyor belt comes full circle which will be too late. Am I going through a mid-life crisis? Probably. I dont think these crisis' have a disposition to a particular gender, just the realisation that I'm half way sends me into a mental tizz!
I finally feel like I'm old enough to get married. Strange but true. I never ever felt that I had the maturity or the committment to give it a go. To be truthful, my record for interaction with the opposite sex is pathetic. I think I put lots of things in the way of achieving a great relationship - motherhood, parenting, work, depression, hatefest - lawd the list goes on.....as it does when I'm practising avoidance. But I'm ready to give it another shot. I think I know my vices pretty well, my faults, my penchants, my obsessions and compulsions. I also know my strengths, my beliefs, my charming quirks and my value :) Some guy is going to get a really good deal - LOL.
Anyway, back to the subject of this blog. I'm going to start my own business soon, its the fear of jumping off the edge and away from a consistent salary that scares the hell out of me. With a sizable mortgage I have to consider this, but with research and some serious calculations I can eleviate some of the stress by getting a really thorough overview of where I'm heading and what I can expect. But at the moment, all my pots are on the fire, all coming to the boil at the same time. I need to move some of the pots to the back so that theres a continuous meal going on and not burnt offerings :)
Going to head off to bed, I'm tired - physically and mentally.
Adios amigo
H2
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